In previous weeks, an earth shattering announcement has been made, an announcement that has polarized fans in the Order of the Science Fiction and Fantastical Realm-Based literature. The announcement that J.J. Abrams is directing the new 'Star Wars' film. This is obviously extremely controversial due to the fact Abrams directed the hit 'Star Trek' reboot.

 As one fan in a ridiculous robe and false ears pointed out, it is heresy for a mortal human to direct both a Star Trek and a Star Wars film. The reason for this is obvious and there is no reason to bother discussing it.

What I propose is we stop fighting. Why can't we all just get along? Why must Punk hate Metal? Why must there be violence in the world and video games? I propose we have the franchises not only shake hands, but embrace in a chocolate mocha. Why not, instead of making seperate sequels, make one all encompassing sequel?

Yes, I'm saying it, because it'd be convenient and the darn thing writes itself-STAR TREK WARS!!!

Synopsis- "Captain Kirk (Chris Pine) returns with best buddy Spock (Vin Diesel, replacing Zachary Quinto as the newly resurrected cloned super cyborg Vulcan ((to be explained in Star Trek Into Darkness))) and the crew of the Enterprise where after a night of partying down with an illegal case of Romulan Ale, the hungover extreme space travellers fall into a 'wormhole' that sends them to a 'galaxy far, far away....

Now it's up to Captain Kirk and hilarious sidekick Wicket the Ewok (Warwick Davis) to spring Han Solo (Harrison Ford) from the retirement planet and get the midi-chlorians out of Darth Spock and back into Qui-Gon Jenni (Chloe Grace Mortez), the snarky savior of the Jedi, who wants to defy everyone and join Starfleet!"

New this week? Zero Dark Thirty (the heartwarming story of Bin Laden's bad day), and The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, as well as Les Miserables. Don't want to spend piles of coin for a movie? Come in on Dollar Thursday. I mean, seriously. It's less. Much less.